On Biases Against Women in Publishing and Life: A Conversation with Liz Alterman
Liz Alterman is a “jack of all genres.” Alterman’s work has been published by The New York Times, The Washington Post, McSweeney’s Internet Tendency, and other outlets. She wrote the memoir Sad Sacked, the young adult thriller He’ll Be Waiting, the suspense novels The Perfect Neighborhood, The House on Cold Creek Lane, and You Shouldn’t Have Done That, and her newest book: a rom-com called Claire Casey’s Had Enough. Told over 13 hours, this novel follows a 40-something mom of three who, as the title suggests, has had it with juggling parenting, working, volunteering, and worrying about her aging parents. When newly separated Claire reconnects with an old boyfriend at her college reunion, she finds herself at a crossroads: blow up her life or try to rebuild it, flaws and all.
Holly Rizzuto Palker met Alterman at the Erma Bombeck Writing Conference in 2024. Realizing they are practically neighbors in New Jersey, Alterman and Palker became fast friends and colleagues. They now perform and write stand-up comedy together with a troupe called The Mom Coms. Claire Casey’s Had Enough piqued Palker’s interest given their shared love of humor. In this interview, which has been edited for content and clarity, Palker talks to Alterman about women’s issues that bond them as mothers and the intricacies of book publishing.
Holly Rizzuto Palker: How did you come up with the idea to write Claire Casey’s Had Enough?
Liz Alterman: Back in 2017, a friend said, “Why don’t we try NaNoWriMo?” Although I wasn’t down with writing 1,600 words per day, I was definitely up for a new project because my memoir, Sad Sacked, was languishing on submission. So I started writing Claire Casey’s Had Enough, a “Mom Com,” which, by the way, is my favorite unofficial genre. I had so much fun writing it. I found a new agent for that book, and she was very encouraging. But we ran into a lot of rejection. Editors said, “This doesn’t fit neatly in women’s fiction or rom-com. It’s not straight romance, nor is it straight comedy. You need to pick a lane. It’s not fresh. It feels familiar.” I revised this thing so many times that I joked, “Is it a study in perseverance or madness?” One issue was that when I originally wrote the book, Claire Casey was still married. When she reconnected with an old boyfriend and fantasized about being with him, one editor told me Claire couldn’t consider an affair.
HRP: Why can’t a female protagonist consider having an affair?
LA: I don’t know. When I told my writing group about the editor’s comment, a friend said, “What are they talking about? Eighty percent of America is having an affair.” I hope that’s not accurate. But seriously, it was because [the editor] wanted Claire Casey to fit neatly into the rom-com genre, and they said readers wouldn’t like a potentially unfaithful main character. Finally, I decided to have Claire separate from her husband at the beginning of the novel so she wouldn’t be considering an affair while she was married. I did this whole revision with this editor, and she took it to the acquisitions board, and it got rejected again because they said “Mom fiction” just wasn’t a thing at that time, which was around 2019. So much in this business comes down to luck and timing. Then, after licking my wounds with multiple projects that had gone nowhere, I thought, “I’m going to try to write thrillers because suspense has a lane. I can stick in that lane.” I had plenty of people to murder in my head. [I had] a lot to avenge.”
HRP: I’m still feeling angry that women aren’t allowed to have affairs. Even in fiction. What if the husband is neglectful or worse? What if the main character fantasizes about having an affair but doesn’t act on it? Why can’t we read a book about those things?
LA: That was kind of my argument. The agent said, “Forget the word likable. Your character is likable, but she needs to be relatable. And for rom-com, people don’t want a main character who considers cheating. Look at Madame Bovary or Hester Prynne. Women who contemplate infidelity meet a terrible end.” It kills me because it’s 2025.
HRP: Claire Casey’s Had Enough is an excellent commentary on women who identify as mothers dealing with modern life. Claire is at a crossroads at the age of 46. She longs for the past she had with an old boyfriend. Do you think this is a natural part of the aging process for women, or does she have this longing due to the difficulties in her marriage?
LA: I think it’s both. She reconnects with Alex, her former boyfriend, at her college reunion. I (and Claire, too, for that matter) never viewed Alex as “the one who got away.” He was more a symbol of that period in Casey’s life when she still had hopes and dreams. And when she reconnects with him, she remembers herself as a woman who was emotionally lighter because she didn’t have the baggage of worrying about kids, work, a house, volunteering, and her aging parents. Alex treats Claire like she’s still a hopeful young woman who has time to fulfill her dream of writing her novel. I didn’t want Alex to be a perfect guy so he’d be the obvious choice versus her husband. Everybody is flawed. There is no one perfect person out there for each of us.
Holly: Tell me about Claire’s friendship with her friend’s mom, who lives down the street. She is in her seventies, right?
LA: Yes, they have an intergenerational friendship and form an unlikely bond because they’re both wondering, Is this it? Is this all there is? They both used to be vibrant, interesting women, and each wants to recapture that. Whether it’s a boyfriend, an old job, the one who got away, or the apartment or trip you didn’t take, I think as you get to midlife and there’s more behind you than there is in front of you, there’s a natural tendency to wonder about all the paths you didn’t choose.
HRP: Is there a path you didn’t choose or one that was different for you than you imagined it would be?
LA: In the early 2000s, I always thought, “I’m going to write a novel someday.” And I thought all it would take was just me sitting down and typing it. I never thought of the business side, the marketing, and everything else that goes into it; I really just thought self-discipline [was] going to be my major hurdle here. And wow, was I wrong.
HRP: At one point, Claire wonders if the volunteer school moms are happy or if they’ve forgotten their interests along the way. Can you talk about how mothers are shamed for following their passions and leaving their kids, but fathers never face that same resistance?
LA: Claire is constantly getting hit with requests to volunteer, and for years she’s done her fair share—but that takes time away from other things she’d rather pursue. I don’t think we see dads do that. Maybe they coach a team or they’re on the sidelines of sporting events, but you don’t see dads canceling their work day to volunteer in their kids’ schools or staying up until midnight making six dozen gluten-free, dairy-free cupcakes—or at least I didn’t see that as much with men. But with women, we put so much pressure on ourselves to be everything to everyone, and adding more volunteer tasks to our plates isn’t helping any of us. If a mom says, “I’m gonna take six hours on a Saturday and write a novel, and I don’t know if it’ll ever sell,” people may view that as selfish or delusional. Many times, if a mom isn’t pursuing something tied to financial gain or for the sake of family, it isn’t seen as worthy because all of that should come first. Whereas if a man runs a marathon, people think it’s great. “Go train all weekend; Mom’s got the kids!” I think women need to support each other in pursuing things that bring us personal fulfillment that aren’t necessarily tied to our families.
HRP: How does your novel-writing inform your stand-up comedy and vice versa?
LA: Ooh, that’s a great question. Comedy has helped me in my goal of trying to write tighter and get to the point quicker (not that you’d know it from these answers!). If you’re doing a three-minute set, you don’t have time for filler. It doesn’t need to be there in fiction either. Specificity is such an important element. I try to get rid of the vague stuff and drill down into the specifics; that’s where the comedy lies. I rely on strong verbs and clear images. With both comedy and fiction, I agonize and leave myself notes like “find a better verb” or “get a better metaphor.” Sometimes, I’ll ask my family for synonyms. They say, “Did you try the thesaurus?” If I’m coming to you, I’ve exhausted it.
HRP: When does great writing happen for you?
LA: I think great writing happens in the rewriting. To begin, I’ll add any idea just to get it down, then I keep going back and honing it until it is the best it can be.
HRP: What’s next for you, Liz?
LA: I finished a draft of another thriller. I have to say, as much fun as I had writing Claire Casey, I don’t know if I would stick in the rom-com space for two reasons. #1: I pitched my editor an idea about a woman in her fifties. And apparently, as much as people don’t want to read about women considering infidelity, they also don’t want to hear about a woman in her fifties. #2: I had a thriller published in March titled You Shouldn’t Have Done That. And I could see the two books on NetGalley. It was almost like having two horses in a race. The thriller got so much more interest. I wouldn’t want to write a whole other novel only to be told that my character can’t be a certain age or she can’t have a certain idea. There are already so many restrictions on women now in real life that I don’t want to do that in fiction. But I do like the idea, so I may consider self-publishing because I think it’s so important to read about female characters thriving at midlife and beyond.
HRP: Do you have any advice for other mama writers?
LA: Don’t give up. When I wrote my young adult thriller, there had been some interest from a publisher that would’ve been my dream-come-true publisher. I’d been reading their books since I was a small child—like, even their logo brought me joy—and when it didn’t come through, it crushed me. Then I was kind of like, “You know what? It’s not this publisher or nothing. There is still a world of other options out there.” Here’s something I see a ton on social media: people who let rejection deflate them and impact their self-esteem. Recognize that not every reader is going to love every book. There are so many bestsellers that I’ve picked up and put down because they weren’t for me. Just because a bunch of people have said no, that doesn’t mean that there’s not someone out there who will say yes. I’ve published with indie presses, and I’ve had great experiences. Keep an open mind. There’s not just one path.
2 replies on “On Biases Against Women in Publishing and Life: A Conversation with Liz Alterman”
Fantastic interview! Lots to think about. Thank you!
Having finally read The Scarlet Letter a few years ago, I can tell you that, unlike Madam Bovary or Anna Karenina, Hester Prynne does NOT “meet a terrible end”, though her lover does. Hester survives, eventually wins the respect of her community, and lives to see her illegitimate daughter marry well. I found this classic novel surprisingly readable and relatable.
I hope Liz continues to write about women as we really are.